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Friday Funny: Lawyer Joke

July 27, 2012

In honor of my attorney sons:

An Observation by US Supreme Court Justice Sandra Day O’Connor
“There is no shortage of lawyers in Washington, DC. In fact, there may be more lawyers than people.”

A Reasonable Fee
A man phones a lawyer and asks, “How much would you charge for just answering three simple questions?”
The lawyer replies, “A thousand dollars.”
“A thousand dollars!” exclaims the man. “That’s very expensive isn’t it?”
“It certainly is,” says the lawyer. “Now, what’s your third question?”

Comic
from Reader’s Digest

Q: How many lawyer jokes are there?
A: Only three. The rest are true stories.

Q: What’s wrong with lawyer jokes?
A: Lawyers don’t think they’re funny and other people don’t think they’re jokes.

Q: What do you call 25 skydiving lawyers?
A: Skeet.

Q: What do you call a lawyer gone bad?
A: Senator.

Q: What’s the difference between a lawyer and an onion?
A: You cry when you cut up an onion.

Q: What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 70?
A: Your honor.

Q: What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?
A: His partners.

Q: What do you get when you cross a bad politician with a crooked lawyer?
A: Chelsea Clinton

Two Kinds of Lawyers
There are two kinds of lawyers: those who know the law and those who know the judge.

Mark Twain notes…
“It is interesting to note that criminals have multiplied of late, and lawyers have also; but I repeat myself.”

Bad Reputation
Isn’t it a shame how 99% of the lawyers give the whole profession a bad name.

People Drowning
If a lawyer and an IRS agent were both drowning, and you could only save one of them, would you go to lunch or read the paper?

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One Comment
  1. July 31, 2012 10:41 pm

    [Great|Awesome|Good|Fantastic|Excellent] post. Thanks!

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